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Twinkie® Wiener Sandwich©

After a hard day of school or work I usually come home tired and a little hungry. And nothing wakes me up or quenches my hunger better than a Twinkie® Wiener Sandwich™. Now I know most of you have at least at one time experience the bliss that is a Twinkie® Wiener Sandwich™, but for the three of you who have never had the taste of the salty sweet just melt in your mouth taste I will explain what makes the perfect sandwich.

After coming in from the cold I leap for joy as I see my mom boiling a hot dog just for me. I take my favorite Twinkie®, strawberry or plain, cut it open lengthwise, and place the steaming hot dog within the sweet Twinkie®. Depending on my mood I like to place a little Easy Cheese® on the dog, dip it in some milk and enjoy. Sometimes when I am tired and hot, I like to take the dog, already frozen, place it in a Twinkie® and maybe add some whipped cream. Nothing cools you down better.

I remember one time in specific. I had just lost my job at a fast food place for reasons I won’t get into. Let me just say that if you got sick after eating Carl’s Jr©. any time in the last few months you got nothing on me. Anyway, I came back depressed, tired, and with an insatiable hunger. But my good ‘ol friend was right on the ball. He gave me my favorite meal and I felt better right away. Instantly I looked through the paper to find another job. Naturally I lost my job again, was kicked out of my house, disowned by my parents, and now can no longer support my drug habit; but even during my down years, I still would do everything in my power to get a piece of that tasty, chewy, melt in your mouth salty sweetness. And I know you’re wondering. What’s this going to do for me? Well, let me say that this sandwich can actually guarantee a loss in weight. It will improve your confidence, no longer will you be bossed around, you’ll be moving on up soon. Expect chances with the ladies to increase too. So, will a Twinkie® Wiener Sandwich© get you promoted? Yes. Will it make your life better? Yes! And will you get some? YES! So go down to your local grocer and remember, don’t stop eating.